How To Handle Being Insulted Online - Kathy Caprino

How To Handle Being Insulted Online Today, I woke up and took a look at my emails on my phone, only to see that I’d been insulted on LinkedIn.  The insult came as a response to a comment I made while sharing a post from my friend William Arruda on 7 Parenting Traits that Help Children Succeed At Work. The parenting trait that I indicated was my favorite in the list was humility. I won’t dignify the insult I got by repeating it verbatim, but basically, the commentator smacked me down with a few sentences on how I don’t display any humility, so how can I say I like it?  And if I do “like” humility, what do I think it means? (insinuating that I must not understand the definition of it because I’m totally without it). And hell be happy to educate me on how I have no humility. From the moment I read this insult, my morning was darkened.   I noticed I started to breathe more shallowly, and my head and heart starting churning with hurt. I agonized over what to do in response. Should I leave it? Should I respond? And if so, what exactly should I say? As one who discusses every day the need for women to speak up more publicly and assertively, I felt that saying nothing was the weak way out. For me, not responding felt equivalent to not being the person I wanted to be. But as I got thinking more about speaking up to this critic, I began having some post-traumatic stress around being hurt and smacked down earlier in my life, after speaking up or “showing up” in a bigger way earlier. Suddenly, I had a flashback of a series of scary, nighttime obscene phone calls I received as a teen girl after being a lead in a school musical, which made me afraid to go to school. Then, I had a flashback of a very frightening time as a therapy intern years ago, when I asserted myself powerfully to one of my rageful, out-of-control male clients who had a violent past. His response made me feel that he might possibly harm or attack me (as we were alone in the office at that time in the evening). I was terribly afraid as my hand hovered over the red HELP button that, when pushed, would summon the police in a few instants. All this to say that if I’m having these feelings and flashbacks after being insulted digitally and I’m very used to having my work critiqued in the public eye I’m guessing that many of you who are reading this can relate deeply to how awful it feels to be insulted online. Especially when the attack is personal and rips at your core personality and the way you engage with the world. I’d love to share some info that might be helpful to you (and to me), going forward, in how to deal with being insulted publicly. Here’s my take: First, we need to get hip to what to expect I put out a lot of content every week, and some of it is certainly controversial, so I’ve had to steel myself to accept that what I share will inflame some folks. In fact, I’ve come to see that that if I’m not getting people hot beneath the collar and agitated, I’m probably not saying much that’s different, important or helpful. So lesson #1 for me has been that if I want to share my personal take on issues, especially deep and controversial ones, I simply have to be prepared for people to offer their own personal take that may be very different, and very emotionally charged. And I also have to accept that I’ll be criticized, and perhaps not in a respectful way. That’s just the price we pay for speaking out and up about complex, important issues that have no easy answer. Secondly, we have to realize that there are some people lurking out there who are true haters Most of us are not haters. Most are kind, compassionate, and caring and have some empathy for other people, even strangers. And most of us don’t want to tear people down because we disagree with them.   Nor do we want to rip apart a stranger â€" we’re just not triggered in that way, usually. But the anonymity of the internet has made us more cruel. We would be too naive if we didn’t understand that there are indeed haters in the world who are lurking online, wounded, waiting to pounce. They feel the need to rip someone down so they can feel better about themselves. Of course, that never works, but they’ll keep trying anyway. I realize that this person who insulted me must have been reading my posts or watching my videos and something today triggered him to want to insult me. I call these people “pouncers people who don’t have the courage and fortitude to engage openly, respectfully, and articulately, but just want to pounce and insult. For these folks, I’ve decided I won’t waste my time responding. In fact, for haters who can’t engage in respectful ways, I’ll block them from my sites and profiles, and I’ll feel good about doing it. In other words, we don’t have to catch every ball that’s thrown at us. Thirdly, if you want to show up â€" with your heart, soul and spirit fully engaged â€" and make a vivid, powerful and courageous mark on this world, you’ll have to learn how to handle critics. As Brené Brown shares so beautifully in her talk “Why Your Critics Aren’t The Ones Who Count,” Theodore Roosevelt offered advice that changed her life, and it’s shifted mine as well. Here’s what Roosevelt shared, so wisely and powerfully: “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” So the final lesson about how to deal with being insulted online is this: Understand that you don’t have to concern yourself (or give a second thought to) the hurtful critics who aren’t courageous enough to get in the arena themselves.   You don’t have to take in their insults, or process them, or do anything at all with their hateful remarks, but eject them out of your sphere, for good. In fact, the more you stew and fester about an online insult that was given solely as a way to hurt you, the more you open the door to being suppressed and diminished. Sure, take in true, constructive feedback from folks who want to help and encourage you to grow and learn. But under no circumstances should we allow (or wallow) in cruel, personal insults that are all about the critics hate, and nothing to do with our own efforts to show up, be heard and make a difference. So, I hope youll stay your course as I will mine â€" continue to be active in the arena, and share your messages, and your heart, soul and spirit openly with the world. Haters be damned. For more from Kathy, visit her personal growth programs here, and her TEDx talk Time To Brave Up.

3 Million Jobs Available

3 Million Jobs Available There are 13 million people unemployed and employers have 3 million vacancies they cant fillwhats wrong with this picture? Ive found a new favorite blog, Careerealism, by JT ODonnell.   Please go visit.   The advice and information I have seen there so far is wonderful. She is  by no means new at this, just new to me. In her recent post, she cites a great Business Week article, Help Wanted:   Why thats A Bad sign.   It looks at the gaps that exists between the job seekers and the employers.   Careerealisms digest of this article is simpler to read.   She points out: Two things will need to occur: 1) Job seekers are going to need to take lesser-paying jobs as part of a ‘course correction’ for their career paths that will eventually lead to better pay and longer-term employability. 2) Companies are going to need to expand and improve their on-the-job training and succession planning so they can hire talent which are a 50% fit and develop them instead holding out for the 90% fit that will never knock on their door. This isnt something either want to hear. Yet, it is most likely going to happen. So bite the bullet, guys and gals, and start today by making the changes necessary to transition.   Not sure where to start? Self assessment!   Then go off and do your research.   Find careers or occupations or industries that have the potential to excite you. Anything healthcare related or green.   You dont need to be providing direct care, but somewhere supporting it.   Green jobs are emerging, and most likely will continue for awhile.   There is even a website for greenjobs.

The Best Ways to Handle Your Career Switch

The Best Ways to Handle Your Career Switch Switching careers is never easy. When you have years of experience in a certain industry and want to make a switch, just think about how much more competition you’ll have. However, sometimes a career switch is necessary from a personal and professional perspective. Writing an effective resume can help ease the transition, but there are several other tips to help you handle a career switch effectively. Enhance Your Education Depending on what career you are switching to, you may benefit from taking educational courses. Not only will this give you a deeper knowledge of your new career, but any executive resume service will tell you it will make your resume stand out more. Combining relevant education with your professional experience in your previous career could end up being more valuable than you initially think. Charge Up Your Networking Efforts You should have been networking in your previous career already. No matter how much you’ve networked in the past, a career switch is the perfect opportunity to put it into overdrive. Networking can help you improve your c-level personal branding to get you in the career you desire. Recruiters want to meet people with a variety of skills today. Even if you may not be experienced in a particular industry, you may have a skill they are looking for and not even know it until you network with them! Consider How Current Skills Apply to a New Career You may not believe your current skills transition into your potential new career, but you could be surprised. An executive resume service can help you highlight these skills on your resume so they will stand out. The key to writing an effective resume is showcasing skills that transition well to other industries. Recruiters look for those types of hard skills and soft skills, so be sure to incorporate them as much as possible. Be Persistent, But Not Too Persistent Never give up on your career switch efforts. Companies may not be hiring at the time you connect with them, but it doesn’t mean they will never be hiring. Check in with them frequently enough so they remember your name, but not so frequently where your name annoys them. At Professional Resume Services, we help executives switch careers every day. Whether it’s writing an effective resume, providing tips on improving c-level personal branding or learning how to effectively network, we are here for you every step of the way. Feel free to contact us if you need advice of any kind regarding your career switch.

If You Read Nothing Else Today, Read This Report on How to Write a Resume for Writing Job with No Experience

If You Read Nothing Else Today, Read This Report on How to Write a Resume for Writing Job with No Experience The Lost Secret of How to Write a Resume for Writing Job with No Experience Many job applicants struggle to compose the ideal cover letter even in the very best of circumstances. Make certain there's a summary statement at the very top of your resume, following your header. Bear in mind, there's a great deal more to you than dates on a sheet of paper, therefore it's your job to make sure that the recruiter knows that. If you own a CV free of work experience, then the secret is to concentrate on your skills, as opposed to the experience you don't have. What you wish to avoid is having an experience section that's almost empty, or one which is full of experience that's not related to your targeted position. Learn about the three sorts of skills you may highlight and the way it is possible to incorporate them into your resume. It's important to select a font and font si ze that's legible and leaves enough white space on the webpage. A resume template can help direct you toward deciding on a design which works for you. As soon as it's only a page or two in length, a resume is among the most important pieces of a work application. Don't forget the idea of Less Is More and filter the information that you have in your job program, only including the relevant information. Entry-level employees, who don't have a great deal of on-the-job experience, should incorporate every job possible when emphasizing the skills that match the work listing. You may consist of odd jobs which might or might not be associated with your intended job profile. While comparing the JD, you shall come across the essential skills necessary for your intended job. Scan the job posting and pull out each of the relevant abilities and qualifications the recruiter is searching for. So look at your resume and be sure that it mentions all the crucial requirements. Wherever you r location, it's crucial that you take the correct steps when searching for a job. Whichever path you choose, stay with it. The above mentioned image gives us a broader idea about ways to compose the resume objective for first job with regard to the remainder of your resume. Without work it's tough to substantiate a usual resume. You might not have work experience, but it's still possible to show off your charming personality. Whether you are searching for your very first job or attempting to earn a career change, the approach starts with your resume. Now it's time to create your first resume. There are several ways you may present the info about each job. Choosing which to use is dependent upon the kind of job that you are applying for and your degree of experience. Stick to the tips above, and you'll have a resume that compensates for the absence of knowledge and gets you the interview. Your prior experiences are regarded as a fantastic indicator of how you will manage the new job.

The Lost Secret of Best Online Resume Writing Servies

The Lost Secret of Best Online Resume Writing Servies Best Online Resume Writing Servies Options How to discover the ideal executive resume writing service can be as simple as picking up the telephone. If you see a service we haven't evaluated, don't hesitate to drop us a message and we are going to take a look whenever possible. Our services won't only demonstrate your value as an employee to prospective organizations, they'll also convince you of your very own expert worth. The service of Resumarea is offered to clients at a fair price that correlates to the value of your self-presentation. Ok, I Think I Understand Best Online Resume Writing Servies, Now Tell Me About Best Online Resume Writing Servies! Other sorts of assignments cost differently, and their prices are easily estimated via the site's price calculator. This list includes not just the category of the resume but the merchandise and price too. It's important to employ a service which offers you a fine price for top quality. You may also perform an internet job search or earn a price of living comparison through its online offerings. The Fight Against Best Online Resume Writing Servies Greatest content can raise your conversion rate. Reasons why you require a productive content writing service. Expert content writing and editing can help you accomplish your very best results. Therefore, it's far better make content for each page that isn't dependent on other sections. Who Else Wants to Learn About Best Online Resume Writing Servies? A lot of people don't like their present job or career. If you need assistance getting clarity on the next career move, you could be interested career path clarity coaching. When you wish to find the best resume help, you're able to simply follow our lead. Best Online Resume Writing Servies Can Be Fun for Everyone EssayBox writing service gives an opportunity for contacting your author straight from the website so as to clarify necessary details of a purchase. The writer is likely to make contact and start to work with you immediately! Regardless of what your experience, and regardless of what job you're hoping to land, we'll match you with a writer qualified to assist you find success. The good thing is that the best resume writers aren't necessarily the costliest ones. Employing a Professional Resume Writer is an excellent idea for the majority of professionals since resume writing is a distinctive skill. Resume writing is the most essential step in presenting your abilities and receiving the job that you desire. Your student would like to earn Mom and Dad proud.

Transitioning Industries How to stand out from the crowd

Transitioning Industries How to stand out from the crowdEven though we all know that most adults change careers at some point in their lives (many more than once), it can still feel like an overwhelming task-but it isnt.What does it take?A great resume. Write a killer resume that highlights your transferable skills, using the keywords for your new industry as much as possible. Emphasize your accomplishments with quantitative evidence (numbers, percentages, dollar amounts, time saved, growth, etc.)For help with a killer resume check out this page.Great networking.Hopefully, youve maintained a good network throughout your career. You can use your contacts there to lead you to new ones. Also, its critical that you get involved with a social media site like LinkedIn. With a professional profile, you can join groups that are relevant to your new industry and make connections that will help you land interviews.Above-and-beyond activities.Job shadowing is a great way to get keywords for you r resume and provide you with talking points for your interviews. Conduct informational interviews to learn more about both your new career field and individual companies.Professional help.Find a career coach (interview coach) who specializes in your new field and can help you pinpoint weak spots, polish your presentation, and help you strategize the best marketing campaign for landing your new job.Interview skills.You do need ready answers to interview questions and a 30/60/90-day plan, but it helps to remember that your goal is this You must be able to demonstrate to the hiring manager how you as a candidate can address the top 4 things hes looking for in a new hireYou can do the jobYou will do the jobYou understand how to be successful in the jobYou wont rumliche lage a risk to his own continued employmentA job seeker transitioning to a new field will have some unique challenges that a candidate with experience doesnt, but there are ways to overcome those challenges. If you attac k your job search in the right way, you wont be just putting yourself on a level playing field with experienced candidates, but you can actually stand head-and-shoulders above them.Peggy McKee has over 15 years of experience in sales, sales management, sales recruiting, and career coaching. Her website, Career Confidential (http//www.career-confidential.com) is packed with job-landing tips and advice as well as the practical, powerful, innovative tools every job seeker needs to be successful.

6 Managers Share How (and When) to Intervene in an Employees Personal LifeFairygodboss

6 Managers Share How (and When) to Intervene in an Employees Personal LifeFairygodboss When serving in a management position, confronting an employee can be an uncomfortablebut sometimes necessarypart of ones job. When an employees partal life impacts their job performance, how should a manager address the issue? This situation can be a tricky one to navigate, but when you are responsible for the upkeep of a company, this a tough call you may find yourself having to make.Six current or former managers weighed in on when confronting employees about their personal lives is appropriate and how to approach the situation1. Make the most out of performance appraisalsWhen private lives start to affect performance at work, it is no longer simply a private issue it impacts the whole business. Managers should familiarize themselves with signs and symptoms of employee burnout, anxiety and depression. If these are detected, managers should step in immediately and, in the privacy of a one-on-one meeting, offer rckendeckung and assistance. Providing employees with help early on can make all the difference. Many organizations are incorporating regular performance discussions in favor of annual appraisals such occasions are an optimal time to highlight any changes you may have noticed.-Stuart Hearn, CEO2. Proceed with kindnessIt is appropriate for a manager to confront an employee about their personal life when it affects the job they were hired to do. When an individual brings all of their issues, schwierigkeits, challenges, etc. into the office, which in turns not only affect their performance but that of those around them, its time to discuss this. It becomes appropriate not to get involved with whats happening at home, but to remind them of their work responsibility and encourage them to find a solution that benefits.I have served in several leadership positions and had to make this call multiple times. My main objective welches to find a solution and not just offer threa ts of losing their position. I wanted the person to know that I was aware of the rough season they were in. When confronting an employee, please do not throw the book at them or come with a long laundry list of all they do thats wrong. Be prepared to have something good to say, and give them the benefit of the doubt and time to change.- Chantay Briggs, coach, realtor, speaker writer3. Present multiple courses of actionSome clear-cut situations in which a manager should intervene include evidence of alcohol or substance use, and behaviors which are typically not tolerated in the workplace. They can lead to erratic behavior, poor job performance and even unsafe conditions, depending on the type of work being done. Therefore, if a manager notices a problem they should arrange for a meeting between themselves, an HR staff member, and the employee in question to express concern and willingness to help the employee get professional help. Giving the worker options and opportunities to wor k on the problem shows real care and dedication to their wellness.Although it might be uncomfortable for the employee to have a third-party HR staff member present for the meeting, this is truly necessary in order for a manager to protect themselves. If the manager confronts the employee alone, theres no knowing how they will react.-Nate Masterson, CEO4. Address the issue early onIn general, managers shouldnt intervene in an employees personal life unless their behavior is impacting others on the team, or if they are unable to perform their duties properly due to their personal circumstances. If this is the case, then its generally best to start with an open and honest conversation about the issue. Managers need to make sure they are highlighting the situation, the behavior they have noticed and the impact that it has had. If possible, prepare a plan to address the situation and monitor the employee to ensure that its working. If that doesnt help, it is best to seek assistance from your HR team to understand the situation and your options.Often, HR will be able to help you with a fit for work assessment that aims to ensure that an employee can perform their role. Otherwise, formal performance management procedures are the next best option. Its important that managers act quickly to solve the problem before it escalates into a larger issue.-Ben Brearley, leadership coach, author and consultant5. Be flexibleI believe that a manager should intervene if an employees personal life is affecting their work. If I were in this situation, I would meet with them privately to ask how they are doing, and mention that Ive noticed a change in them and their work, ask if there is anything I can do to help or if they need to take a few days off work in order to deal with what they are going through. Sometimes this is really needed, but the person is afraid to ask because they dont want to risk their job. By offering this option, they know we care, that they have our support, a nd that time off wont affect their job status.-Carol Smith, business owner6. Offer solutionsFor 14 years, I was the department administrator at a university. I supervised an administrative assistant and various student assistants. I was hesitant to intervene in their lives unless it was warranted, meaning if it interfered with their well-being or job performance. But when my former administrative started getting a lot of personal calls from family members that left her upset and affected her work, I stepped in. Because of our close relationship, she shared a little about what was going on, and I suggested ways to handle some of her issues. For example, if an issue was serious but not an emergency, addressing it could wait until she got home.-Carol Gee, authorManagers and company leaders reached an overall consensus that intervening in an employees personal life is acceptable only when their personal life impacts the way in which the employee performs their job. With this in mind, ma nagers who find themselves in this situation should approach the situation with kindness and tact. Offering solutions and involving the human resources department can also help the situation go over as smoothly as possible.--Kayla Heisler is an essayist and Pushcart Prize-nominated poet. She is a contributing writer for Color My Bubble. Her work appears in New Yorks Best Emerging Poets 2017 anthology.